Haven’t met the Four Sides of Calise yet?
Read the intro and get to know them here!
This 4SoC was written 2/11/19, while I was attempting to work through some feels. This is usually how it goes, lol.
Callous: So… what’s going on? It’s too quiet.
Ecee: Shhh! We’re being sad. Ellie needs time to reflect on everything.
Squeezy: Trying so hard not to bring up everything we need to do.
Ecee: You think it’s being easy for me?! I have so many things I could suggest we be anxious about right now! But… I think we really need this.
Callous: Ugh, I hate being sad! It’s so exposed and you just have to sit there, and you can’t escape the stupid *beeeeeep*ing emotions!
Squeezy: Well, we could. We’ve hid from our emotions plenty in the past, hiding in getting crap done or letting Ecee worry incessantly.
Ecee: I am awfully good at it!
Ecee: But we’ve seen how badly that goes. The only way to handle sadness is through, it seems… Although she is taking a while…
Angelle: [in a little voice] Um, guys, could you maybe stop talking so much?
Ecee: Sorry!!!
Callous: Stop saying sorry and shut up already!
Ecee: [whispers] I really am sorry though!
Squeezy: Aah, this is so hard, there’s so many other things to think about and distract ourself!
Callous: I’m bored.
Ecee: Ooh, a text!
Squeezy: Do you have to answer that right away?
Ecee: There’s another option??
Angelle: Guys, I know it’s being hard to focus on letting ourselves be sad, but I think it’ll help everything.
Squeezy: I’ve got it! We could listen to meaningful music!
Ecee: Yay music!!
Angelle: Stuff that reflects the past and helps us recall the emotion of all our experiences? Sounds promising.
Callous: Sounds painful.
Angelle: Oh, so you’re the one who’s been skipping painful songs lately?
Callous:… Sometimes it’s her. [Points at Ecee]
Ecee: What, do you want me to start crying at work randomly?! I have to work up to feeling things sometimes!!
Angelle: And you guys won’t just use it as an excuse to get distracted again?
Ecee: Nope! Nope nope nope!
Squeezy: I am focused!
Callous: You’re not the boss of me.
Angelle:… How do I ever get anything meaningful accomplished around here?
Ecee: 😇
Squeezy: 😇
Callous: 😈
Angelle: Okay, we can turn on sad music, that’ll probably help. But Ecee, you are to close all social media and means of communication with the outside world. That includes Discord and text! I see you glancing at that Facebook notification!
Ecee: Aw.
Angelle: Squeezy, no YouTube tutorials, Google search or any other research right now. And leave that Keep notification right where it is, missy!
Squeezy: But what if I forget thoughts or researching is no longer relevant??
Angelle: If it’s not relevant in an hour, was it really relevant now?
Squeezy: Fine.
Angelle: And Callous…
Callous:…?
[Angelle comes over and gives her a hug]
Angelle: It’s okay, I know you’re sad and worried about people too. I know it hurts. It sucks how much it hurts.
Callous: …
Callous: Let’s listen to “Atmosphere” by Joy Division. I’ve been avoiding it because it hurts, but it really is a good song.
Angelle: Thank you, Callous. Any other requests?
Squeezy: “Scars to Your Beautiful” by Alessia Cara and “The Greatest” by Sia.
Angelle: “Fire and Rain” by James Taylor.
Ecee: “Bushes of Love” by Bad Lip Reading.
Other three: …?
Ecee: Stop judging what I get emotional about!!
Angelle: No, I think it’s understandable, each of those songs has a painful association for us because it’s emotionally tied to someone specific who we have unresolved pain about.
Angelle: Which should we listen to first?
Callous: Let’s go with Squirt’s suggestion. When in doubt, go with Bad Lip Reading.
[Gather around computer and music notes emanate from it] 🎶🎵
Ecee: [starts dancing] “49 times…”
Squeezy: “Aw, that’s rad!”
Callous: “Crispy bodies by the door…”
Angelle: “I know you really want someone to hold you… But we’ve all got a chicken-duck-woman-thing waiting for us!”
Angelle: See, it really is meaningful, Ecee. Sometimes we want to curl up and hide, but we can be strong and intrepid. And we may find the thing waiting in the bushes is just a big cow.
Ecee: [giggles]
Callous: Next you’re going to claim Yoda singing about seagulls will bring world peace.
Squeezy: “Yoda will change your life!”
Angelle: “That log had a child!”
Ecee: “♪ Doo doo do, do doo do do! ♫”
Callous: Now you’re all just quoting Bad Lip Reading. If I have to be the responsible one and get us back on track being sad, then I think we’re all doomed.
Angelle: Humor can go hand-in-hand with sadness. It’s reminding us of the first time we experienced all these, and that’s meaningful too.
Ecee: “♪ Dustin, Lucas, El and Mike, ridin’ on a bike to save a friend from the Upside Down!! ♫”
Squeezy: Is that a cue to turn on “Atmosphere” or…?
Ecee: I’m hungry.
Callous: Holy crap guys, we only listened to one song and it was the silliest one!
Angelle: It’s okay. Like Ecee said earlier, sometimes you have to work up to sadness. It’s not really something that can be rushed. We can be sad in incremental chunks.
Ecee: [emphatic nod]
Callous: But I got all geared up! We could have had a touching moment where I get in touch with my inner sadness and show I’m actually tragically hurting inside and not made of stone after all!
Angelle: … Nah. We’re all really hungry now.
[They start walking out of frame]
Squeezy: What sounds good?
Ecee: Chips!
Squeezy: You always say that.
Ecee: BBQ chips!!
Callous: Guys!! Come on! What if I cry? I could probably get myself to cry!…
Don’t make me play “Fire and Rain”! I’ll do it!…
Callous: [running to catch up] Come on guys, wait up! I want chips too!
[The girls stuff their faces with chips while listening to “Scars to Your Beautiful.”]
The end!!
Much love,
<3 Calise
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